


alone, without you by my side

by peterneds



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Canon Divergence - Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Canonical Character Death, Hurt No Comfort, If You Squint - Freeform, M/M, Poetry, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), but it works with eg canon, i wrote this after iw before endgame came out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-16
Updated: 2019-05-16
Packaged: 2020-03-06 04:18:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18843499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peterneds/pseuds/peterneds
Summary: steve's letter to bucky, after the snap/title from 'all i want' by kodaline





	alone, without you by my side

darling, i do not know how to go on without you.

i've lost you so many times you'd think i'd be used to it by now. but i had you back. you were supposed to be back.

you left last time, of your own free will and you don't know it but i cried tears when i woke up to a cold bed,

when i'd think for a second you were there and i'd reach for you

but i had you this time. and i held you. and i should've held on longer but, god. i thought that just this once. the universe had had her peace with us. that i could relearn all the new lines on your skin, every worry wrinkle, every callouse.

i don't know how to get you back this time, darling. you left without a trace - and it wasn't your fault, sweetheart. you've never left me willingly. for all these years, we couldn't bear to say goodbye to each other.

i think this time i might be leaving you. i'm sorry, my love. i'm so sorry that i couldn't hold you longer. i'm sorry i forgot the way your eyes crinkled when you smile. the way you'd spread your palm over my ribs when my lungs played their games with you. i'm sorry, sweetheart. i'd stay if i could. you know that.

i love you. with all that i've got. i hope you don't forget, darling. i'll keep your heart safe no matter where i am. no matter where you are. i love you.

**Author's Note:**

> not at how i literally predicted steve leaving bucky and didn't realize until i sent this to liz today
> 
> anyway i just wanted to say i started posting mainly interwebs headcanons on my tumblr and i'm really liking it so if u wanna check that out my url is hcllnd!
> 
> prompts are always welcome & encouraged! here's where to find me  
> twitter: leofjtz  
> tumblr: hcllnd  
> spotify: ree182


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